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[14 Sep 2005|08:47pm] |
crying sucks.
&&& i hate it.
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[28 Apr 2005|09:01pm] |
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mood |
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 loved |
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music |
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taking back sunday |
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happy eight months.
i love you oh so much.
<3
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[02 Jan 2005|06:29pm] |
yes, so i`ve decided that i am the luckiest girl in the entire world.
i. love. him.
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| i feel like complaining, please excuse me. |
[23 Dec 2004|10:35am] |
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mood |
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 cold |
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joseph leaves for his mission trip in mexico in like 3 days. i don`t even think i`ll be able to see him before he leaves. ha, what am i saying? i`ll see him somehow, i hope. if my mother decides not to be a massive super bitch. she`s been very good at that lately. i don`t think i can be stuck in my house with her any longer than i absolutly have to. that sounds aweful doesn`t it? oh well. maybe it`s just me or something. who knows. anyhow, sorry for my complaining. i hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas.
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[14 Dec 2004|04:26pm] |
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mood |
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 blank |
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music |
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wake me up when september ends |
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i decided i`d do this too...
10 people that stick out in my mind.
1. you`ve been here for me my entire life. sometimes we get along and others you just make me so mad. i love you more than life itself, and i worry about the choices you make sometimes. i stay up late on the nights you don`t come home like you`re supposed to. i know that i can trust you with a lot of things. you`re wonderful. and i hope you realize that you can always count on me to be here for you.
2. i blame everything bad that happnes on you. i know that sounds bad, but i can`t seem to help it. you gave me my first real broken heart, but you also made me stronger for it. i know that i could never really hate you no matter how much i say i do. i hope you go far with your wrestling this year since it`s your senior year. good luck @ BYU.
3. you stress me out so much. but you do it because you love me and want to see me achieve all my hopes and dreams. you`re always there no matter what. someday i hope i can be half of what you are. you`re the best!
4. we used to be so close. we were bestfriends since i can remember. somehow all that ended. i miss you! even though now we don`t ever really talk i hope you know i still love you like you were the sister i never had.
5. you can bring a smile to my face no matter what`s going on. i`m glad you decided to run XC. i remember all those times at your house with everyone. you always tell me like it is even if you know i don`t want to hear it. i love you to death and you`re crazy.
6. i never thought i`d find someone like you in my life. you mean everything to me. you listen to me and you`re always there no matter what. i share so many things with you that i know no one would understand but you. you completely stole my heart. you`re such a wonderful gift from God and i`m so thankful he blessed me with you. i wouldn`t trade the time i`ve known you for anything. i love you.
7. when we were little you used to hide behind your dad and i`d hide behind mine so we didn`t have to talk to each other, and look at us now. i can`t believe it took you pinching my butt freshman year for us to become this close lol. i love you to death, you`re my bestfriend. we used to go for drives and talk about everything, i miss those. but i know when we both have some time we`ll catch up on things.
8. you`re antisocial, loud, and sometimes difficult to live with. it`s hard to show my love and respect for you because you don`t show emotions. you crack me up. sometimes you make me so mad but it`s because i`m your "little girl" no matter how old i get. i love you and without you around most of the time i`d go insaine.
9. we met freshman year in english class. who would have thought that through all that crap back then we`d be so close now? i absolutely love, love, LOVE your car. we talk about everything together. and i`ve learned that when i don`t listen to you i always screw up. okay, well MOST of the time anyway, haha. you`re wonderful and i love you.
10. i remember when the entire XC team hated you. and you hated all of us as well. we were always so mean to each other. but going to Brevard and actually getting to know you i found out you`re an awesome girl and i`m so glad we`re friends. i know you don`t like all the "girly" things i do, but you still compromise with us most of the time, haha. you`re the sweetest cowboy i know! you`re the best and your board in coach`s lab cracks me up. i love you dear!
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| aw, pretty song! |
[29 Nov 2004|04:17pm] |
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mood |
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loved |
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music |
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my chemical romance |
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now you`re here and everything`s changing
suddenly life means so much
i can`t wait to wake up tomorrow
and find out this promise is true
i will never have to go back to
the day before you
in your eyes i see forever
makes me wish that my life never knew
the day before you
but heaven knows those years without you
was shaping my heart for the day that i found you
you`re the reason for all that i`ve been through
that i`m thankful for the day before you
this weekend was one of the best ever. thanksgiving break was so much better than i thought it would be. joe got back on friday and the first thing he did was call me to see if i wanted to hang out. i almost freaked out in the middle of kohls when i answered my phone and it was him lol. i <3 when he just wants to hold me in his arms. he`s simply the best! sunday was three months and he gave me a teddy bear + this super sweet card he made me. it was beautiful.
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| it`ll happen once again.. |
[22 Nov 2004|04:43pm] |
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mood |
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 cranky |
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music |
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dammit <3 |
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i haven`t updated in a while, so i figured i would. i`ve been pretty happy with things lately. a few minor things have sucked, but stuff happens yah know? i`ve grown up a lot lately too. it just seems that some things that used to be fun and i`d like to do just are stupid and childish. i don`t know, it`s really wierd. i`ve been really happy with things but sometimes it just feels like something`s missing, like...i want something more than what i`m getting. and i feel like i`m addicted to joe or something. i`ve never wanted to be with someone so much. it`s crazy. he`s absolutely the best person in the whole world. but i need to go!
*..our love's in bloom, our love has just begun. our love is proof of what is yet to come..*
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| i think i`m going to explode... |
[04 Nov 2004|07:19pm] |
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mood |
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 satisfied |
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music |
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green day! |
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i just ate so much chinese food. i think i`m gunna freaking explode, i`m dead serious. and after state saturday i`m going to stuff myself even more, haha. i`m craving a cherry coke, so i`m ready for saturday to come. that sounds bad doesn`t is? umm, oh well! there was so much drama involved with XC this year i`m ready for it to be over and done with. the end part was better than the rest though i suppose. today we ran @ UCAR plant in there field and stuff. it was actually pretty fun. allie, rachel, and i all rolled down this huge hill like 5 times. it was really fun, i swear haha! i just pray saturday goes well..i`m extremely nervous. but it`s gunna be okay! anywho, i should go now.
*i`m so glad we became such close friends before we got together. i love you! <~~ that`s for joesph! tehe.
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[30 Oct 2004|08:50pm] |
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mood |
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content |
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words could never really describe how i feel when i`m in his arms and he looks into my eyes and says the perfect things...
i love him.
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[17 Oct 2004|06:54pm] |
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being so happy is the best feeling in the world<3.
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| 20 things... |
[14 Oct 2004|08:31pm] |
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mood |
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 sleepy |
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music |
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justin`s iM |
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i <3 the way your arms always fit perfectly around me.
i <3 how you smile when we look in each other`s eyes.
i <3 how you always make me smile.
i <3 your silly notes.
i <3 the fact you don`t take advantage of me or my feelings.
i <3 that you can be as silly or as serious as i can.
i <3 our long talks.
i <3 eating ice cream while we look at the stars.
i <3 how dorky you are.
i <3 your eyes.
i <3 the way you play with my ears, even when everyone else thinks it really odd. =)
i <3 how much you care about what matters to me.
i <3 how we make up stupid sayings together.
i <3 when you play your guitar + sing for me.
i <3 how you always babble on about your Green Day.
i <3 how even though you`re on crutches you still find some way to put your arms around me while i`m at my locker.
i <3 how you kiss my forehead.
i <3 how you look into my eyes and say the sweetest things.
i <3 how we both yell at coach mcniel and then make fun of him afterwards, haha.
i <3 the fact that you weren`t afraid to take a chance on us.
you`re the best ever, and i love you.
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[09 Oct 2004|06:01pm] |
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mood |
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blank |
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i don`t want this to ever end...
<3.
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| <3 |
[01 Oct 2004|11:39pm] |
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mood |
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loved |
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music |
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american idiot |
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tonight was wonderful and everyone looked so pretty!
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| whoa! |
[29 Sep 2004|07:23pm] |
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mood |
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 bouncy |
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music |
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jessica`s iM<3!!! |
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this week has been pretty fun. i`m so happy lately, i swear!
yesterday was one month and joe bought me one hot pink rose + this massive hersey`s bar. i almost cried when he gave it to me. he`s so effin sweet! we had a meet yesterday too. it sucked so bad! i threw up a lot...damn you leprosy! haha but joe made everything ok. he`s really wonderful.
but i must go, just thought i`d update!
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| out on your corner in the pouring rain.. |
[16 Sep 2004|04:51pm] |
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mood |
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 cheerful |
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music |
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maroon 5 |
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my day today was so awesome. lately, everyday has been wonderful. no, it`s not all because of joe, but he does have a huge part of it. i love my friends and i love running. but we`ll see how that changes after saturday, lol. but i`m going shopping after the race saturday, so i`m happy. i <3 shopping. and i <3 this feeling that i`ve had lately. it`s like nothing can bring me down and i`m constantly laughing and smiling. i`m back to being me. it`s taken so long for me to realize that life shouldn`t be spent being sad and unhappy. God is so wonderful. i love going to church. that`s another new favorite thing of mine lol. this is really random but i just felt like telling everyone my opinions + feelings lately. i hope everyone has a super awesome day ;]
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| randomness |
[11 Sep 2004|09:38pm] |
i`m lost in your love
but i`m scared to death
that if i blink
you`ll be gone in a breath
don`t you know
we belong together
can`t you see
You`re the one i favor
don`t you know
we belong together
together, together...
aw, i heard that and i thought it was pretty<3
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| it`s alright to tell me how you feel about me |
[07 Sep 2004|08:56pm] |
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mood |
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 creative |
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music |
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'dammit' - blink 182 |
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today was grand. i got the sweetest note ever and i was ever so close to crying. it made my day so wonderful. joe graham is so effin awesome. it`s always a constant smile on my face these days.
my friends are another reason why i`m so happy lately. they really are the sweetest people ever. oh and thanks t-shirt for making a *special* trip to my house just to bring my viedo camera you`ve had for like 8 months lol. and it`s rachie lou`s birthday today! her mom bought the XC team cupcakes. heck yeuh..i had like 3 and then i got 4 left over ones..but i got beat up for them lol.
but now i must go read Scarlet Letter. all my love kids!! <3
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| rolling down the hill...! |
[04 Sep 2004|10:39pm] |
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mood |
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chipper |
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music |
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graham colton |
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right now i love everything. i love my friends, my parents, God, my running (even though it`s not that great lol), the pointless voicemails i get, and just...everything. before i went over to allie`s tonight i found all these pictures of my birthday. usually the make me sad and bring back memories then i get mad because of everything he`s said and done since we`ve broken up. but tonight, they just made me smile and laugh and i realized there`s more to the memories than just sadness and hatred. i`ve learned to let things go and just come as life brings them. i know that God has His plan for me and it`s going to be carried out no matter what. and i`m fine with that. i`m so much stronger right now than i ever have been. i realize what i want and i`m not afraid to go after it anymore. ahh i`m not even sure why i`m so happy or why i`ve come to all these realizations, but i just have and i feel good about it. i like the way my life is going right now.
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